Man in love can be so needy. That’s how he expresses love and affection. But, how to tell a guy he’s too clingy? Let’s discuss it.
How to tell my boyfriend he’s too clingy?
Being needy to our partner can be cute. It shows affection, romance, care, and compassion.
Not only girls, boys can also be needy. For example, after a tired and hard day a man will come to his girlfriend to seek attention, to feel affection, or just to be accompanied.
It’s a natural thing in a relationship that also reflects that your boyfriend can’t be separated from you.
But, what if your boyfriend is way too needy. It can make a relationship unbalanced, annoying, and exhausting. Umm, so how to tell my boyfriend he’s too clingy?
1. Find out why
Before accusing him, maybe you can find out why your boyfriend is being clingy. Okay, it’s not easy to address his insecurities but maybe you could:
- Try to understand his fear. Maybe his fear of being left, the fear of losing you, or the fear of not being good enough for you.
- Encourage him to discuss his past or something deeper that affects his behavior today. Also, maybe this is caused by his past relationships.
- Find out his way of showing affection. Also his state of mind and acts to love someone. Needy and clingy people tend to have problems with self-esteem and insecurities. That will lead to much bigger problems, mostly in a long term relationship or if the relationship wear off.
- Encourage him to have his own life or to get his life together, while you are still there accompanying and supporting him.
So you could have a bigger picture why he becomes so needy and clingy. Also, this helps you and him to have a better solution.
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How do you tell your partner to stop being clingy? Communication is the key, they said, and it’s true.
Why can’t you tell him directly? Are you afraid this could hurt him? Or this could screw him away?
It’s not. Sometimes men need to be told what to do. And it’s okay being honest.
Also, why can’t you be honest to your lover? If you can’t even say what’s on your mind and how you feel about something to your boyfriend, is it really how good love works?
Yes, sometimes we can’t say things we badly wanna say. But think about this, him being clingy way too clingy and you are being silent when you aren’t comfortable can slowly destroy the relationship.
Because it’s an imbalance. You guys are two different people with different perspectives, but a relationship can work just if the two of you can communicate all the difference and uncomfortable things-to find out how you guys can get along in balance.
3. Just tell him clearly
Bet he is in love with you so he’s being clingy. So, telling ‘babe you are too clingy’ won’t make him unlove you all of a sudden. It will shock him a bit, but he will think about it nicely.
how to nicely tell your boyfriend he’s too clingy? Here’s it:
- I love you and I love spending time with you, but I think you crossed my space a little too much. That’s not a bad thing but it makes me a bit uncomfortable.
- Honey, I know you love me as I do. But, lately I find you clingy. Can we discuss it nicely?
- Baby, I feel a bit uncomfortable when you are a little clingy. I know that’s maybe how you express love but that’s a bit too extra. Can we talk about it?
- Babe, I feel you are being too clingy and needy lately. Yes, I will give it all for you but won’t you give me my space too? So, we can go in balance…
- I like it when you focus on me, it makes me feel so important and beautiful. And I love you as you do, but it’s a bit needy and clingy lately. I think it would be better if you also have time for yourself, umm, let’s discuss it?
- Hon, I find you way too clingy and needy lately. And I need my space too. Yes, I love you but can we go in balance?
- I do appreciate your big attention, love, time, and energy. But in real life we gotta do something else too. I wish our love didn’t bother us to achieve more in life.
- Hon, sorry but I think you’re a bit needy. I wanna tell you that I am not rejecting you by saying this. I want to see the same values in this relationship and show love where the two of us are comfortable.
Just tell him honestly. Using harmful language he can understand it easily. Speak up your points and the potential solutions.
Also, you may discuss with him about:
- Dating rules.
- What you expect in a relationship.
- What’s the ideal relationship for you?
- How you see the relationship.
- How to set up a healthy relationship.
Then watch his response. It’s good that he can address his insecurities and wanna learn about self-awareness and self-love. If he denies it and blames you and screams about it, umm you gotta think about the whole relationship again.
Remember, you will see and experience much bigger problems in relationships.
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3. Is he really in love?
When we were younger, we thought it was love when our boyfriend or girlfriend being needy and clingy. Tragically, we call it cute. But it’s not.
So, your boyfriend being way too clingy, is it love or is it just a phase? A honeymoon phase? Like, in early relationships these things happen so much because all we know is their good sides only, being in love hormones, and everything is romantic.
Is he just too curious? Is it an obsession? Or, you just feel his ego and give what he wants, so he doesn’t think about your needs and your feelings.
4. Address yourself
Why are you so lacking in backbone until you don’t know how to tell a guy he’s too clingy?
Evaluate your own conduct and behavior in the relationship.
You give what he wants even when you are not into it or uncomfortable, he will keep doing it.
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5. Set boundaries
Knowing to set boundaries in a relationship is healthy. You will learn about respect, awareness, open community, and the balance in relationships.
- Tell him what you can and can’t do in a relationship.
- What’s a healthy relationship for you?
- Be honest about what you need.
- Listen to what he needs.
- Communicate everything nicely.
- Designate when you need space.
6. Learn to build relationships
There’s a lot to learn to build a happy and healthy relationship. Love itself is not enough.
We need to learn about compromise, honesty, trust, patience, understanding, compassion, balance, characters, how to solve problems without more problems, and everything in between.